Accompanying Tweets to The Lover's Dictionary by David Levithan: F

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Sorry for the delay on posting these! I thought I already posted the words for F but apparently not...

fable, n.:  Sometimes you make me feel like one of those bears, wondering who’s been sleeping in my bed, who’s been eating all the porridge.

fabric, n.:  At first you feel the thread between you, and then, as the love grows, you feel it weaving into everything else.

fabulate, v.:  You can turn a dinner party into a cage match, or a wrong turn into a misadventure -- a harmless storytelling lie.

facile, adj.:  Never dismiss anyone else’s pain.  I know I’ve had it easy, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be hard.

facsimile, n.:  When you go away, I ask you to leave a metaphor behind to keep me company. “I need you as colors need light,” you say.

fact, n.:  It should be the basis of certainty, but more often than not nowadays, it's the basis of argument.

factor, v.: The five minutes of our morning goodbye can spell out my mood for hours throughout the day.

factotum, n.:  In love, there is no such thing as a specialist.  You are on call all the time, for everything.

facture, n.: Because it’s not what you tell me, it’s how you tell it.  The quality of the tone, not the words. I gauge your brushstrokes.

fade, v.:  Let the world go quiet around us so we don’t have to make noise to be heard.

failsafe, n.: I guard a small part of myself, invulnerable, because I know that’s where I will have to retreat if everything goes wrong.

failure, n.:  I don’t fear the damage as much as I fear the sadness the damage will cause.

faint, adj.:  Seeing your distraction, I wonder whose silhouette is walking through the room.

fair, adj.:  It’s a tricky thing, to hold on to your ideals and to hold other people to them.

faith, n.:  The choice that doesn't feel like a choice; love is always greater than the sum of its evidence.

faithful, adj.:  Promise to hold on to me in a way you will not hold on to anyone else.

fake, adj.:  Even the most innocent are still afraid of being found out, because we are never fully comfortable with our own roles.

fall, v.:  That first night, you held on to me like we were both plunging through the air.

fallacy, n.:  You seem to believe things can fix themselves, but a relationship is no different from a broken teacup.

fallibilist, n.:  A life lived by the laws of scrutiny can only be lived in tiny fractions.

fallow, adj.:  When it gets to be so late that neither of us can pin down a thought, so we let the conversation rest for a while.

falsehood, n.:  The thing about lies is that they are hard to sustain; life gravitates naturally toward truth.

familial, adj.:  We have created our own blood between us. We have created our shared history, our shared traits.

familiar, adj.:  Even if I never fully know you, I will know you more than anyone else.

fancy, v./adj.: If you’re going to dress your words in ribbons and bows, I want there to be meaning underneath the decoration.

fanfare, n.:  The playful sweetness of your “Honey! I’m home!”

fantasize, v.:  You should never stare at your fantasy while you are having it.

far, adj.:  When you are outside of help’s distance, I feel it keenly.

farce, n.:  Those thin moments when love seems reduced to pantomime.

farewell, n.:  The word tells us: If we’re going to part, let us part as friends.

farouche, adj.:  Shyness sounds so much better as this, as if my timidity is somehow exotic, hidden behind the ripeness of the syllables.

farrago, n.:  Love is a confused mixture of hope, despair, and reality.

fascination, n.: Predictable as I say you are, I never know how you'll respond, so I keep throwing out words, to see how they’re returned.

fashionable, adj.:  You forbid me from growing a beard, because you allege I will do it for the wrong reasons.

fat, adj.:  More than a measure of weight, this is a measure of the perceived inadequacy in trying to control it.

fate, n.:  You can only believe in this if you are willing to take everything else for granted, which I am not.

fathom, v.:  You send your empathy into the depths, to find the elusive swim of a sure explanation.

fatigue, n.:  When the unbearable seems to outweigh the bearable, and you are too tired to correct the scales.

faucet, n.:  Sometimes at night only one of us hears the drip.

fault, n.:  The desire for blame increases over time in a relationship, as does its needlessness.

faux, adj.:  Every time you use this word, I think of you as a fake.

faze, v.: Why do we think that lies are smooth to say?  For me it’s the truth that glides out, and the lies that fall rough on my tongue.

fealty, n.:  To love, you must vacate the concepts of owe and own.

fear, n.:  The bone-deep feeling that all your worst expectations have come true.

feasible, adj.:  I have never heard anyone say, “I love you within reason” – it’s just impossible to do.

feast, n.: The meal you cooked me wasn't as important as being there to see how you danced and fussed with the ingredients.

feat, n.:  I never imagined anyone putting up with me for this long. I want to congratulate you.

febrifuge, n.:  When the pressure of life frenzies me into a heat of confusion, I need you to be the cold compress of focus and calm.

feckless, adj.: It’s safe to assume that we generally know each other’s thoughts by now, but it’s also safe to assume we’ll get some wrong.

federation, n.: I saw my parents as this form of government – a central ruling body, and then lesser bodies in charge of their own affairs.

feebleminded, adj.:  You laugh and say that your behavior (we found the keys in the toilet; no one flushed) is a preview of when we’re 80.

feed, v./n.:  If we unplug for even a weekend, the phantom limb pulls at us, back toward the trough.

feel, v.:  What if you get to the heart of me, and find that it’s dead, or was never born?

feign, v.:  It’s probably best if I don’t know who you want me to be, because then I don’t have to pretend to be that person.

felicific, adj.:  Fittingly, this word makes me happy just by existing.

fence, v.:  In our effort to keep things in, we inevitably keep things out.

fend, v.:  You’re the one who’d be worse off abandoned in a jungle, because there’d be no one around to laugh at your jokes.

feral, adj.:  This part of love particularly scares us, when our intellect is reduced to a pure, primal, uneducated want.

feretory, n.:  I still keep your number from that night folded in my wallet, a currency I will never spend.

fermata, n.:  Spend a day doing nothing with me;  hit the  pause button, let quiet be the music for once.

ferment, v.:  Bear with me -- sometimes what I learn needs some time to shift from experience to knowledge.

ferocious, adj.:  I can only summon the lion when I need to defend myself; it will not show up for aggression.

ferry, v.:  If you cannot be the boat that carries me from this to that, then at least be the tide helping me along.

fervor, n.:  Sweep me away with strength as well as speed, the depth of your interest as well as the thrill of the chase.

fester, v.: It's our stubborn refusal to treat the wound that makes it worse.

festive, adj.: I like it best when we celebrate holidays of our own invention, waking up on Sunday, say, and declaring it devoted to red.

fetching, adj.:  You dress yourself up to be a compliment magnet, and I can see your pride when the plan works.

fetish, n.:  I couldn't even say what your feet look like.

feud, n.: Our armies only run a few people deep, friends on either side.  Better to join forces and take on greater enemies than each other.

fever, n:  Heat with an edge of delirium, not so much caught as incited.

fiasco, n.:  I told you to imagine me calling your mother by the word “Mom” and you were filled with laughing horror.

fib, n.: I can deal with the lesser lies, the ones told so I don't feel worse.

fibril, n.:  It's good to remember that the heart is not a unanimous object.

fickle, adj.:  The constant questioning of whether what you have is enough, and what you want is the right thing to have.

fiction, n.:  You accuse me of storytelling, and I remind you that all fiction is at least 90% emotional truth, layered over by invention.

fiddle, v.: It is a wise lover who knows if you control the music, you also control the steps. Resist the temptation to attach strings.

fidelity, n.:  The dictionary connects faithfulness with a clarity of sound, and it is right to do so. Our love should be high-fi.

fidget, v.:  Thoughts wander out of us, uncontrollable.

fieldcraft, n.:  Many observations of love cannot me made from a remove; knowledge of love is experiential.

fiendish, adj.:  I get home from a long day of work to find you've finished the leftovers I spent the past three hours anticipating.

fierce, adj.:  There are times I would claw through walls for you, and other times I would claw through walls to get away.

fight, v.: Escalates from an argument when you make it about more than the now, pressing on the fault line where who you are meets who I am.

figment, n.:  The currency of dreams.

figura, n.:  The dictionary says you can represent a fact or an ideal; I would rather you represent a good interpretation.

figurative, adj.:  This is how language dances about architecture, and we can approach an understanding of the things we grasp to know.

filament, n.:  Illumination does not come from enormity, but rather a fine focus that then expands into light.

file, v.: Yes, I intend to keep track of both our misdeeds, but more often than not, the folders will get misplaced.

filial, adj.: You have the same color eyes as your mother, but they're different eyes. You share some of her anger, but it’s not the same.

filibuster, v.:  There is power in vowing that I will not stop until you have finally heard.

fill, v.:  It is mistake to think you can ever pour yourself enough into another person to make them more yours.

fillip, n.:  I am crying on the phone and you come over, put your hand on my back, and stay there for as long as it takes.

filmgoing, n.:  For bad movies, we talk as soon as the credits roll, but for good ones, you ask for a five-minute grace period.

filter, v.: It shifts to match the mood; during good times, you only remember other good times. When it’s bad, the trail only leads there.

filthy, adj.:  I ask you to talk dirty to me, and you laugh and murmur, “Two pigs in mud.”

finagle, v.:  As much as I’m unsettled by your charm with strangers, I do love it when it gets us free coffee and alcohol.

final, adj.: I think it's the last time, I say “this is the last time,” and then, on the other side of it, the next time’s already here.

finance, n.:  You roll me over, kiss me, say, “So much for marrying rich.”  I smile and say, “Yeah, we both kinda botched that one.”

find, v.:  The nature of love is discovery, and discovery of that will lead you as far into yourself as it will into the ones you love.

fine, adj.:  When you tell me this is how you are, I know we’re in the realm of the adequate, where you can only stay for so long.

finesse, v.:  You are the smooth operator and I am the one who’s been warned against smooth operators, but fall for them anyway.

fingerprint, n.:  Our most identifying features are ones we can’t see until they leave a mark.

finicky, adj.:  Is your pasta really rendered inedible if it's been touched by peas?

finite, adj.:  I can only give you so many chances.  You have been warned.

firebreak, n.:  Heat of the argument, you think you've reached my core indifference, but you've hit the cleared ground protecting the truth.

fireworks, n.:  We ooh and ahh like children, enjoying life that simply and that gloriously.

firmament, n.:  We want the tangibility of knowing, but are left with the ungrounded ephemerality of faith.

first, adj.:  I’d meant “I love you” before, but never with this entirety, never with all of my days contained within it.

firsthand, adj.:  I don’t want to rely on airwaves and pixels, words and wires.  I want you here, here, here.

fission, n.:  The closer you get, the more intense the explosion will be when you’re torn apart.

fissure, n.: No relationship can grow without also cracking;  the key is to use the cracks as handholds, to pull yourself up.

fisticuffs, n.:  You come home with a bloody nose and say you were defending your honor.  I ask you why, and you say you can’t remember.

fit, n./v.:  We must exercise the us-shaped space, so it can hold everything that we lodge into it.

fitful, adj.:  The first weeks of sleeping beside one another, navigating the space of two bodies in a bed, acquainting.

fixable, adj.:  There never was an instruction manual, so let’s rely on intuition here.

fixation, n.:  Largely aural; the way I hear silences as well as I hear words, and often misinterpret both.

fixture, n.:  How many requests does it take to get you to screw in a lightbulb?

fizzy, adj.:  “I’d rather be bourbon,” you say, “because champagne never lasts.”

fizzle, v.:  Some nights peak too early, leave you walking among the embers with too much time to think and too little light to go by.

focal, adj.: The truth is not in the eyes so much as it's in where the eyes land.

fodder, n.:  I am not your material.  You can try to make me whatever you want, but that’s not me.

foe, n.:  Sometimes the person you love is your greatest rival for that love.

fog, v.:  We should be able to see the past clearer than we see the future, but that’s not how it is with us, is it?

fogey, n.:  I’ll admit, I love it when we natter and smirk with each other, as if auditioning to be an old couple together someday.

foible, n.:  A foible almost sounds collectible. We don’t consciously put them on display, but eventually you’ll meet them all.

foil, n./v.: I knew you could be my counterpart the night you held the tin-wrapped leftovers out to me and said, “Oh, no, foiled again!”

foist, v.:  Love is not something I've done to you.

fold, v.:  Our bodies curving, our lives bending into each other, the hearts make their enclosure because they know we’ll feel safer there.

folderol, n.: The word you mutter when you see the rows of valentine cards, Hallmark insincerity. Love, you say, can’t be pre-printed.

follicular, adj.: I told you it was neat to see our hair braided in the drain like that, and you said, “You have a weird sense of romance.”

follow, v.:  Even down the wrong turns, knowing they will still wind us to the right place.

folly, n.:  Spectacular foolishness that comes with spectacular failure, imagination betrayed.

fondness, n.:  When a person becomes one of the things you cherish about life.

fontanel, n.:  In the infancy of a relationship, the bones have yet to fully form, so you must be tender and let them grow to protect.

foodie, n.:  When mere sustenance will not sustain you, and raw materials are bestowed with the aspirations of art.

foolhardy, adj.:  I saw the warning in some people’s eyes. They saw their history repeating in me, and I couldn't guarantee otherwise.

foolish, adj.:  I sing along when Belinda Carlile belts, “If I’m a fool for love, I don’t care, I don’t care!”

foolproof, adj.: To protect from foolishness, include it within the plan; know we will play each other’s dupes, but laugh about it later.

footfall, n.:  The pace of you in some other room, then the better sound of you getting closer.

footloose, adj.: You're certainly free of fanciness, but who cares as you teach the dance floor how to dance, heels helium, hands to heaven.

footprint, n.:  We arrange ourselves around one another and then there, in the sand, it is momentarily visible.

for, prep.:  This one’s dedicated to the one I love.  The words don’t come for me, but for me to give to you.

forage, v.: Love shouldn’t turn you into a scavenger. If you feel you’re doing more searching than savoring, it’s time to give up the hunt.

foray, n.:  I love it when we are a Technicolor parade of two, dancing within our own exuberance, striding through the streets.

forbid, v.: When your temper tells you to do this, remember you're neither my monarch nor parent, and even if you were, it still would fail.

force, n.:  Love is not an object, but a force.  It has its own energy, its own power, its own trajectory.

forcefield, n.:  As a child, I'd often walk around in one of these, and hope that telling someone it was there was enough to keep it intact.

ford, n.:  Instead of staring across the resentful river, you and I need to walk the banks, find the best spot for crossing.

foreboding, n.:  I would wake up and know you weren't there.  I’d see you beside me, but was convinced that was the illusion.

forecast, n.:  You’re not unlike the radio weatherman.  It’s only when the drops start to fall that you can guarantee it will rain.

foreground, n.:   I can focus on the things behind you, but you are still a blurry, large presence that I inevitably encounter again.

foreseeable, adj.:  The river bends; the only certainty is that there will still be a river for us if we keep going.

foreshadow, v.:  I look for this shadow everywhere – on your phone when you check it; in the pages when I turn them; by our feet.

forfeit, v.: I no longer have to seek someone else; I must hope I will never find someone else and have to turn away.

forget, v.:  Love is a partial amnesiac, enabling us to justify our disagreeing versions and then erase them, too.

forgive, v.:  The just barely possible act of letting go of blame.

forlorn, adj.:  I am dreaming of your intonations even in the cusp of silence.

formative, adj.: Your room was too close to your parents'.

formidable, adj.: I will pull off the ledge and wrestle you to the ground and show you strength you have no idea I possess.

formulaic, adj.:  The people who think there is a pinpointable science to love are not the ones to believe.

fornicator, n.:  This is not a dirty word.

fortuitous, adj.:  That we should both be looking at the same time, and that we should end up looking in the same place.

fortunate, adj.:  I feel I would have half a life without you.

fortune, n.: Custom says to add “in bed,” but you prefer to add “with you” instead.

forward, adj.:  We have ups and downs, but it’s always forward.

fossil, n.:  When we excavate our past relationships, a few retain their shape, no longer bodies, remembered from the bones.

foul, adj.:  The bitter smell of deceit tends to seep into the furniture, and can take years to air out, if that.

found, adj.: The first step to belonging.

foundling, n.:  There's a part of me that thinks of you as orphaned from your old, more difficult life and adopted into mine.

frabjous, adj.:  Stopping for ice-cream on a summer night, then walking and kisses that still taste as sweet.

fracas, n,:  Be careful.  The life of the party can also be the death of the relationship.

fractal, n.:  We lodge a tiny piece of ourselves in every place we love.

fracture, n.:  Sometimes we don’t even know it.  We sense something is off, but have no idea that it’s begun to break.

fragile, adj.: We're vulnerable to hurt, but we're also stronger than that hurt. Each time we feel so fragile, we also learn we are not.

fragment, v.: Memory wants us to subsist on the patchwork of pain and pleasure left when the space holding the letters together dissolves.

frame, n.: No matter how much we try to keep the pose, times eludes any portrait. We can display the snapshots, but we can't live like them.

frantic, adj.:  When the unknown appears exponentially larger than the known, inducing a panic that feeds on itself.

fraternize, v.:  You can’t let it cross over from flirting to conspiring, not in front of me.

fraud, n.: I said I could dance, then feared the dance floor. I confessed by the time it came, but you still dragged me on, said I did fine.

fraught, adj.:  You have to understand, it’s a sign of how much I love you that so much is tied to alarm bells and warning signs

fray, n./v.:  Joining it makes me feel like I am doing it inside.

frazzle, v.:  When the jagged accumulation of questions I have for you keeps stabbing into the composure I try to maintain.

freak, n.:  Whoever made the mold was crafty in making it so tight, so you can always feel the pressure of the places where you don’t fit.

freckle, n.: It’s like each represents an aspect of your personality; I think I know them well, but they are never fully mapped or counted.

freedom, n.:  Control over your own time.

freelance, n.: At times I feel you’re employed by our love, but working in another place. There are few benefits in this arrangement.

freefall, n.:  The fear from the precipice, complicated by the knowledge of how momentarily exhilarating it would be.

freestanding, adj.:  If you don’t build too close to one another, the fire won’t spread.

freestyle, adj.:  Your words sound spontaneous, but there’s a plan beneath them, a deliberate flow.

freeze, v.:  Heat will make you run, but cold will trap you in place; when you emanate no warmth, something in me perishes.

freight, v.: Baggage is easy, by definition a carriable size. I feel more like a wan locomotive, adding car after car until I can't move.

frenzy, n.:  Kisses that fuse like a match has been thrown into a warehouse of fireworks.

frequency, n.: The foolish but heartfelt belief that we live in a world on infinite wavelengths, and you find the only person sharing yours.

freshman, n.: In that picture of you, I see little wisdom put plenty of promise, a joy in the finding before you know what you've found.

fret, v.:  I worry about us and me and you.  But that worry comes from love, nothing but love.

fricative, n.: The notion that some words are bound for friction from the letters placed within them, but we can just talk them through.

friction, n.:  Human nature is not by nature smooth.

friend, n.:  Someone you can trust with anything.

friendship, n,:  The core element of any lasting relationship.

frighten, v.:  To make someone believe that safety is a lie and harm is inevitable.

frippery, n.:  Sometimes, without knowing it, you call too much attention to the fact that you’re trying to call attention to yourself.

frisson, n.: The whole room seems to teeter, and we know it’s teetering toward something we shouldn't do, or something we really should.

frivolous, adj.: It’s not that you glide through life, but sometimes you fly the wrong altitude, too high to see what you need to see below.

froideur, n.:  The reason we can’t seem to relate to the people in French movies is because they have so much of this.

frolic, v.:  Dogs know this better than we do – the joy of letting it all leap.

from, prep.:  A recognition that nothing exists without a past.

front, n.:  I try to throw up a wall to prevent people from seeing what goes on inside, but with you, there are always windows.

frontier, n.:  The unknown territory isn't always that which lies in the future.

frontispiece, n.:  Every story should start with a picture to set the tone.  Ours would be the first subway goodbye, that kiss.

frost, n.: I can feel it settle in my veins the moment I see I've asked one question too many, have pressed the issue one assumption too far

frothy, adj.:  The heady times of bubbly contentment, when all we can do it drink each other up. Are we smiling, or is it only gas?

frown, n.:  Not so much the opposite of a smile as the evening out of the line, inscrutable neutral.

frowsy, adj.:  Five o’clock shadow on my face, two a.m. shadow on my mind.

frozen, adj.:  I will allow enough cold to wake me up, but not enough to paralyze me.

frugal, adj.: It is always a mistake to withhold love because you are afraid it will run out.

fruitful, adj.:  A perfectly ripened Saturday when we walk along a river and talk with the excitement of two people who've just met.

frump, n.:  To dress like a couch.

frustration, n.:  When other people seem so much more free than you will ever be.

fubar, adj.: When I become the kind of person who breaks into his lover’s phone, just to make sure that no imaginary threats have called.

fuck, v.:  Whoever tried to made a dirty word out of pleasure did not reckon on how pleasurable this word would be to say.

fudge, v.: To lead your lover to believe the cake disappeared from the kitchen in the middle of the night from some evaporative property.

fuel, n./v.:  It is a complicated chemical, emotional, and at times nearly geological process, but I draw such power from you.

fugacity, n.:  It is not wrong to allow things to disappear, as long as you are careful to balance them with things that remain.

fugitive, n.:  You were running from your family long before you were running to me.

fugue, n.:  I lose myself.  No one else replaces me when I go missing.  I am simply gone, and then I am back.  You wait.

fulcrum, n.:  We cannot let other people’s opinion become the point on which your love is balanced; we must fashion it from our own desires.

fulfill, v.:  Contained in love is the promise of love, and by loving you, I am continually keeping that promise.

fulgent, adj.:  You shine like a catastrophe, and I can’t look away.

full, adj.:  It is essential to leave some space empty; you could – and should – never fill in all the blanks.

fulsome, adj.: I can be overwhelmed by how attracted I am to you, in part because I can’t let myself believe you look at me the same way.

fumble, v.:  I should have just said that I liked it.

fume, v.:  Discontent may be odorless but anger will make itself known.

fun, n.:  When the only consequence is enjoyment.

functional, adj.: I don’t mean this as a dys-; let’s call attention to the things that work, since they rarely call attention to themselves.

fundamental, adj.:  Everything I offer to define this is a variation of the word “respect.”

funereal, adj.:  Feelings of loss bring us together as the reality of loss makes its presence solid in the middle of our lives.

funk, n.:  When you're in one, it's best to listen to some.  The canker and the cure sometimes share the same name.

funny, adj.:  I heh while you HA! – but we repel the same absurdities with our laughter, rather than letting them sink in.

furious, adj.:  When you become nearly mythological with rage.

furnace, n.:  Love is the arrangement of coals; sex is the paper we throw upon it from time to time.

furniture, n.:  The cast of characters within our apartment, each piece gaining more and more story over time.

further, adv.:  All we can see is the horizon, but we aim for beyond that.

fuse, n./v.:  My thoughts merge in such a kinetic, jagged frenzy that sometimes it’s too much, and I break to save myself.

fussbudget, n.:  After our first mutual laundry run, you informed me I was folding the towels the wrong way.

futile, adj.:  Part of love is knowing I will never be able to change you to the extent that I might want to, and accepting that as okay.

future, n.: The present is what I say and write; the future is what you will hear and read.

fuzzy, adj.:  Memory loses its edges, but that’s what makes our lives comfortable enough to live.

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